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lyrics

Andrea’s arms

Andrea’s arms had no great strength,
They were shapely and feminine,
Admired by many,
But Andrea thought they were the wrong length
To pick up a jar from a high kitchen shelf.

Andrea dreamed of longer arms,
And an end to stretching and reaching and bending.

Andrea went to a doctor of plastic surgery,
Known for his methods quite drastic
And when Andrea’s bandages came off what’s more,
She realised her knuckles were scraping the floor.

Andrea’s mother greeted her daughter,
Smiling so gaily with her in a ribbon,
But her lips trembled the moment she saw her,
“Oh Andrea,” she said, “you look like a gibbon.”

Now Andrea swings like an ape through the trees,
And Andrea’s mother has caught a disease.

credits

from Dinosaurs Ate My Caravan, released May 17, 2014

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Biscuithead and the Biscuit Badgers Leeds, UK

From time immemorial these musicians have stood at the gateway of nonsense begging peanuts. Spending most of their time trapped in force fields and vortices, occasionally they are released to stalk the streets of Leeds. On such occasions you might hear the plaintive cry of Sam’s tuba, the mournful crow of Dean’s ukulele, the excited jazzy croaking of Bob’s piano or the purr of Matty’s drums. ... more

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